Dogs Die in Hot Cars, Asshole

This was supposed to be yesterday's post, copied from The Stranger, a weekly alternative newsrag here in Seattle. The column is called I, Anonymous, and people get to rant about things that really piss them off, and they get 15 seconds of fame and free air time for their grievances.

"Every summer, every single animal welfare organization from here to Outer Mongolia warns people not to lock their pets in their cars. DON'T YOU LISTEN?!? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? Those two dogs that you carried down to the edge of Green Lake on Saturday evening to try to cool down looked more dead than alive. They were so pitiful, lying there like limp noodles and panting so hard you'd have thought their lungs would burst right out of their ribcages. And they don't get that bad after only two minutes, so we all know you were lying out your ass. We were begging you to get them to the mergency vet on Stone Way, and you kept saying, "I think they're getting better" when they hardly had the strength to lift their heads off the ground. Hopefully next time some kindhearted, responsible soul will break all of your car's windows and take them away from you!"